Independence: A Lost Goal

I remember a time when parents' only goal for their child was that the child would grow up and get out!

It's not so today.

Today, childhood is extended to the late twenties, and beyond. Children stay home. They refuse to move out. Reasons cited for this phenomenon are: they can't find jobs in their "chosen" careers or they have too much debt. Some precious darlings, skip the leaving home part, get married, and bring their spouses to their parents' home.

Adults living with parents is not all bad. However, some of these grown "children" refuse to help with chores, won't pay their way, and don't want to be confined to household rules. Helicopter parenting has turned against us. We clung to them first, now our grown children cling to us. We are truly taking care of grownup "children"!

I thought about this phenomenon after, I read a story about a four-year-old girl in Siberia. She walked for six hours, in -29 degree weather, to tell the nearest neighbor that her grandmother had died. Her blind grandfather was at home with his wife's body. I marveled at God's loving protective hands over her as she traveled, and I marveled at her bravery, stick-to-it-ness, and her resolve.

No, I don't think we should send four-year-olds on six-hour journeys, in below-freezing weather. I do feel, and always have felt, that our children (here in the USA) are coddled too much. We go to great lengths to prevent children from experiencing any kind of pain. So much so, that many of our children are environmentally disabled. Nothing is wrong with them, but their overly indulgent environment is crippling them.

Let's see if our children can do more, do better. Let's raise the bar. If we expect more, we will probably get more! God watched over the four-year-old in Siberia as she tackled the six-hour walk, in 29-degree weather. We can expect God to protect our children as they tackle their student loans, get jobs, rent their own apartments, etc... Tell me, what you think.