How far do you go, parents? Do you look through computers, drawers, backpacks, and pockets? It’s difficult to know where to draw the line. Some teens are trustworthy. While others need supervision. How far do you allow them to fail? When do you step in to support them so that they can be successful. Parenting indeed isn’t a one size fit all program.
Seems like parenting was more straightforward a long time ago. Not only was every teen in the house reared under the same parenting style, but they also received the same rewards, and consequences, Motivating them wasn’t given any thought. I don’t remember my parent caring one way or the other about anything I didn’t like or did like. My mother only knew one thing, “you’d better do what I tell you.”
This is a new day, now.
Society encourages parents to fret over everything, “from if teens have friends, to if teens will be successful.” Things that were considered teen’s unnecessary evils, college entrance exams, for example, have become an epic decision-making problem for parents. Parents are giving in to society’s pressure and infantilizing teens more each day; these same parents under the same pressure from society, are giving teens adult size responsibilities, such as cars, complete freedom to come and go as they please, and credit cards.
This is a quandary. Parents are fretting more and more, attempting to control the outcome of every decision concerning the teen, while relinquishing control of those things that needs to be monitored more closely. It’s so many voices, screaming at parents, that it’s difficult for parents to hear their own voice.
Ignore the voices that have all the answers. Listen to your heart. You know your child more than anybody else. It’s good to learn all that you can, but it’s impossible to keep up with the whims of society.
I believe parenting was more relaxed, because parents did what they thought was right, and left it alone. They were okay with making mistakes, and didn’t worry about their child’s self esteems so much. I'm not saying that it was good or bad, it seems like it was a lot easier.
Enjoy your day and your teens. Stop worrying.